Michelle, Serena, and Naomi: Why The World Does Not Believe BIPOC Women Deserve Peace
It was Audre Lorde who said ““Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” As a Black woman, I am also reminded that “my very existence is political”.
In spite of our lived experience being one in which we must survive at the intersections of racism and sexism, the world does not seem to view BIPOC women, and Black women in particular, as deserving of peace. There is this expectation that we sacrifice our well-being for the betterment of those who are only at one intersection of our identities (Black men, white women), because we are keenly reminded that when we fight battles, the world benefits from it.
For Black women, these sacrifices have been central to our experiences for over 400 years. Our bodies were brutalized in chattel slavery to build this country through the providing of generations of slave labor. When we have been harmed by those within our own communities, we have suffered in silence because we are pressured to not “be responsible” for the incarceration of (primarily) Black men. We have been an afterthought within gender-based movements who wanted our bodies/our resilience/our stories, but not truly our voices or leadership.
Our peace has not mattered to anyone, regardless of our “station”. We are depicted as not worthy of the humanity we are owed. We are expected to be silent, knowing that in our silence, Zora Neale Hurston warned us that ““If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.”
During the Obama Administration, we witnessed First Lady Michelle be depicted as a savage. Dehumanized as she continued to tell the world to “go high”, as that same world denigrated her.
We witnessed Serena Williams’ being caricatured, embodying the Sapphire stereotype — — as rude and loud — -while also having comments made deeming her strength and Black woman body as not truly being feminine. In her speaking out about racism and sexism within the sport that she has dominated, like other Black folks calling out such, Serena’s concerns have been further dismissed and/or resulted in additional racist/sexist commentary.
Black women are not granted emotional safety. Our demands for such are often met with rolled eyes, dismissive tones, a bastardization of the expectation that we be resilient, or just a demand for our silence — -the “shut up and take it” concept that has been the mantra for Black women for centuries.
Now, Naomi Osaka, the Haitian-Japanese professional tennis player has prioritized herself, and the world is “big mad”. She has made the decision to not place herself in front of a Press Corps who thrives on not caring about the well-being of those that they profile. In her openness about her anxiety and depression, she has decided that she must do what is best for her — -and that does not include engagement with those who have never valued the identity or experiences of BIPOC women in sports. Who, even when they claimed to value her, did so as a part of their attempted marginalization of a Black woman who paved the way for her in a sport that has been inherently racist.
Naomi is being fined (and threatened with expulsion) for her refusal to place herself in a situation that is not good for her mental health.
BIPOC women, especially Black women are “fined” in their lives everyday when they make decisions that put them first.
We are called selfish.
We are deemed sell-outs to our community.
We are told that we are not deserving of prioritizing our own peace.
Yet, in all of this, we must stop forcing ourselves to “go high” when others go low, because pushing for unrealistic altitudes results in our being unable to emotionally breathe.
We must call out racism and sexism when we experience it and see it, knowing that we may not be supported in doing so.
We have to step back and unapologetically insist on self-care/our mental health, because no one else will demand the same for us.
#DrTyffani #CenteringSisters #RacialTrauma #NaomiOsaka #SerenaWilliams #MichelleObama #BlackWomenMentalHealth #ZoraNealeHurston #AudreLorde
Dr. Dent is a licensed psychologist. Her hardest job is being a Black Woman who centers the experiences of Black women and girls. She recognizes that her existence is political, and so is the centering of her own mental health. Make sure to “Like” her Facebook and IG pages (@DrTyffani) and subscribe to her Medium page.